Top Ten Ways to Tell If You Have A Large Family

1. Your vacuum is a wet/dry shop vac.

2. Your vehicle is so crowded that there isn't even enough room for a cup holder.

3. If you want to buy a vehicle that comfortably fits your brood, you probably also need a CDL license. 

4. Recipes are always doubled or tripled.

5. Your 'style' request at a salon is: "Anything I don't have to style."

6. Your dining table options are: a $3000 Amish set or a plastic 8' table and chairs. (Guess what we have??)

7. Your washer and dryer keel over about once a year from exhaustion.

8.  You have a 30 gallon trash can in your house.

9. Diaper companies send you a Christmas card every year.

10.  You have to use a minimum of 2 carts to do grocery shopping.

 

Easy Crockpot BBQ Chicken

Here is a quick (labor-wise!) and yummy dinner that is great for keeping the kitchen cool and making a delicious meal for all.

Ingredients:

3-6 frozen chicken breasts (I use some from a 3# bag of freezer chicken breasts)

1 to 2 cups your favorite bottled BBQ sauce

Directions:

In the morning, throw 3-6 frozen breasts (depending on your crowd size) into a crockpot. Cover with 1/2 of the amount of sauce (1/2 cup for 3 breasts/1 cup for 6). Cook 3-4 hours on high or 6-8 on low, depending on your schedule. 

After that time has elapsed, take the lid off and turn to low. Take 2 forks and, using one in each hand, shred/separate the breasts in the crockpot (they will easily fall apart). When done, stir them in the sauce that remains and add the other 1/2 amount of sauce (or add till desired consistency.....I never measure, I just squirt it in.) and stir to mix. Cook a bit longer, or serve immediately. The chicken is great served in hamburger buns with chips and fresh fruit salad.

A Day At the Park

We had a picnic and took the kids to Wildlife Prairie Park yesterday. It was wonderful and they have been doing many improvements there. We rode the train (both ways) and had a nice relaxing day hiking and stopping at the general store. They have a penny candy table there that is great and all the kids (and mom and dad) got a handful of candy for a total of $3.15! Good deal!

The black bear, wolves, bobcat, fox, otters, and cougar, were all out to show themselves. The buffalo were close and we could see a few small calves roaming out there. The elk were active also.

We did not make it to the 50 foot slide with the kids, but we are members, so we'll save that for another day. 

Mike finished his last final for this semester on Saturday, so he has a month off school till the summer semester begins. I think that we may go to Cahokia Mounds this weekend or go camping. Not sure yet, but ready for summer fun!

'What'.....Is So Funny??

Earlier this evening, we were preparing for a walk around the neighborhood as it is 60 degrees out right now....heatwave! 

I was in the closet in the living room getting a hat and jacket for Katie. In the kitchen, I overheard my husband, Mike, talking to our son, Noah. 

Noah obviously did not hear Mike because he immediately asks, "What?"

We all have our pet peeves, but for Mike it is the reply, "What?" to something misunderstood. I next overhear him coaching Noah in the kitchen. 

"Noah," Mike says, frustrated. "You do not say "what" when you cannot hear someone. You say, "pardon me".....

Noah, obviously not hearing or understanding, again asks, "What?"

"Noah!" 

Mike tried again, bless his soul. "Do not say "what". You should only say "excuse me" or "pardon me" if you cannot understand."

"What?"

"Never mind!" (loud sigh from Mike) "Go get your shoes on."

By this time, I am laughing my head off in the closet. It is too funny!! Gwen comes into the living room at this time and sees me laughing.....

"What?" is Gwen's question to me, to which the irony of it all only makes me laugh all the harder.

So, I go to the kitchen to dress Katie in the coat and hat and Mike sees me giggling. 

"What?" he asks, confused.

At this point, I am totally laughing and leaning on the table till tears are falling. I replay to Mike what I overheard and what Gwen said and the humor finally sinks in to him and he and Gwen and I are all laughing our heads off over all the irony.

Like a perfectly choreographed scene, Matt comes back in the door right then. He sees us all laughing and asks:

"What?"

'Pamper the Momma' Lunch Wrap

Take some grilled (or just cooked somehow) chicken leftovers chopped up to equal about 1/2 to 2/3 a cup. Then add about a tablespoon or so of Miracle Whip or Mayo and a tablespoon of dried cranberries and a tablespoon of chopped walnuts. Mix well. Place mixture in the center of a flour tortilla, fold the sides in and roll up from one end. Enjoy. 

YUM! 

On the Battlefield at Aldi

Mike and I have been analyzing our grocery bill and have found that Walmart's increasing prices are not making that 'one-stop-shop-super-walmart-saved-my-life' as cost-effective as it once was. 

So, we have turned to our other friend: Aldi. 

In fact, it is twice as money-saving because it is 4 blocks from our house. It is great and the prices are low, but it has a few very odd 'quirks' that cause me to twitch. For instance, Aldi carries cranberry/peach chutney and dill infused marscapone cheese, but no baking powder........go figure.

Well, Mike and I went on our monthly 'big' grocery trip this evening. It was a 'hot night' at Aldi and the crowds were thick. I could see why with .69 cent eggs, $1.79 milk, and $1.49 butter. I was impressed. So, we filled almost 2 carts. Many who walk by us throw out the customary comments...

"Hey, you feeding an army?" .....Almost.

"What time do I show up for dinner?"....Har har...

I giggle at the usual comments and am fully impressed with a truly original line someone throws my way. Aldi is unique also in the fact that they have the most inexpensive and absolutely wonderful German chocolate I have ever tasted. Since they are based in Germany, so much of their food is from there and it is great. Another bonus. They have really come up with some competitive items like a brand of coffee that we got called "Donut Shop Coffee Blend". Well, it looked liked Dunkin donuts coffee, but the jury is still out as to whether it TASTES like it.

So we are armed with two full carts and are revving our engines for the actual sport which is Aldi. It's like a free workout. I am serious. You almost have to be doing some extra training for this part of an Aldi trip, but you'd better be ready because it's coming and there is no way around it.

That is the checkout.

These cashiers are tired, grumpy, and FAST. You'd better be getting those groceries up on that conveyer as fast as you can get them up there, because those groceries are going to fly....literally. There is a cart that is kept at the end of the line where this cashier is flipping them into the bottom as fast as they can cross the infra-red line. The beeps from scanned groceries sound like the EKG of a runner after a marathon while the customers are flinging groceries as fast as possible onto the line. Almost surreal. However, do not slow down, or the 'regulars' will be yelling their 'line rage' from the back.

"Come on!"...."This is taking forever".....

I dare not slow down.

So, the cashier, amazed even then at the amount of groceries we have is flinging and manages a comment.

"That's a lot of rice."....well, I guess a 10# bag is large....

I am, at this point..panting, however. I do manage a, "We....have a ....large family...(gasp!)."

"Lot a kids, eh? Let me see. I'll guess from the looks of things that you have 6."

Ooohhh.....an expert.

"Why, yes, we do." I am exhausted, but impressed. "How did you know?" 

I have to know.

"Well, there are a lot of families that shop here that have a lot of kids."

A moment passes while I crawl to the register to pay. Breathe slowly....

Mike is already starting to bag and box all he can as quickly as possible when she delivers the next question. 

I must have a sticker on my forehead. 

We had no kids with us.

"You homeschool too, don't you?"

Bingo!

 

What is it with Paper and Danger??

Being the mother of six young children, I am always in a state of awe and wonderment at the point that each of my children have fallen in love...in fact, become obsessed...with two things.
Paper and danger.
This has occurred with all six children at around the ages of 8 months to maybe...well, I'll have to do a future study on this one. It is like their palate has honed in on the flavor, texture, and otherwise utter blissful 'mouth-feel' of.....drumroll....paper. Yes, folks. Paper. That bland nasty white or colored stuff made out of trees that have been pulverized, chemicals added, and rolled out to a fine sheet. It ranks number one at our house in toddler dietary requirement. There is always some type of paper in Kaitlyn's mouth and she will pull on shelves, heedless of any danger (also a love of toddlers at my house) for.....paper. It's like I can read her mind..."Love paper. Must have paper." If there is paper in a fifty foot radius of her, she will do everything to get it into her mouth.
My husband always laughs...and winces...as the comics come out....well....you know.
Another thing highly desired is danger. It's like her guardian angel is checking us to be sure we are on our toes. If there is a set of stairs to climb, a shelf to pull, or a needle in a haystack...a baby will find it. Lost something small, metal, and sharp? Just put a crawling child on the floor and you will have it in mere minutes. They are like human metal deteators. And when they find it, you better be alert, because it will go right into the mouth. Amazing.
Recently, one of my other kids spilled a bunch of my mother's straight pins on the floor. All five of my children looked all over the floor (and myself and my mother) for at least half an hour to find them all. Wouldn't you know it, but every time we saw Katie, she had another we all had missed in her hands.
Mike did an experiment where he laid out a bunch of her bright and shiny toys in front of her and placed his Swiss Army Knife in there randomly (closed, of course) and sat Kate in front of the array of items. She quickly scanned the items and immediately grabbed the knife.
Scary...
Hmmm....I wonder if paper has any nutritional value......